Reminders

So, it’s Mental Health Awareness week. I wanted to say something profound and helpful. Profound wasn’t happening, it’s been long and hard week, so this is different to my usual posts on here. There’s enough misery in the news, I can’t bring myself to type about difficult topics, so I wanted to share some reminders of the little things that help me instead. I hope it helps you too!

On days that aren’t so good:

• Accept it, shit happens. There are good days and not-so-good days
  • You can’t change it by sheer willpower
  • But allow yourself to accept that a bad day can become a good day
• If everything feels out of control, control the controllable (cliché but true)
• What are the BIG things that feel out of control? Get a pen and paper, break each BIG, SCARY thing into subtasks until each subtask feels manageable. Try putting each SCARY thing onto a different piece of paper if you think you’re going to get overwhelmed by the number of subtasks
• Keep off social media (no “quick looks”) – each post is just another little thing that you can’t control
• Set yourself tasks
• Reach out to people
  • As much as it can be the last thing in the world you want to do… it can often make you feel a lot better
  • Video chat if you really can’t get out (like a lot of us at the minute)
  • There is always anonymous helplines if you really don’t have anyone!
• If you need to, cancel!
  • Some days it simply is too hard and you really just need a day off
  • Sometimes rescheduling instead of cancelling can be less stress/guilt though
  • Be as honest as you can with whoever you’re cancelling on (it’s the decent thing to do, chances are they’ll understand, and you’ll feel better for honesty)
• If you have tasks you can’t avoid, try to make it easier on yourself
  • If you must meet a friend at the other end of town, could you convince them to come nearer to you? (With a reasonable explanation, people will understand)
  • Plan a treat for afterwards, whether it’s a chocolate bar or a bath
• Prepare for the good days, there’s some tasks that might feel a little beyond your reach and that’s okay, so get yourself ready for when you do feel up to them
  • Plan an activity with a friend (to look forward to in the future)
  • Decide when you’re going to do the work on that you didn’t do, you’ll have less guilt for not doing it!
• Forgive yourself, and be kind to yourself (really mean it, if you aren’t quite there yet then keep trying)

On good days:

• Enjoy them
  • No “what if…”, no guilt or anxiety about how long the good feeling will last (easier said than done, I know)
• Prepare yourself for future days that aren’t quite so good
  • Bulk cook a meal so you can eat well if you don’t have energy to cook in the future!
  • Make a note of quick, easy tasks that make you feel better and keep them somewhere easily accessible – eg. A note on your phone (this could be going for a walk, looking out of the window, reading a happy news site, colouring, whatever helps!)
  • Put together a self-care kit/list for harder days, or to be enjoyed on any day (mine includes a blanket, fluffy socks, baggy t-shirts, candles, dark chocolate and apple tea)
• Learn about yourself
  • This applies to all days, but good days are often when you’re in the best mindset to evaluate things
  • Is there anything that made the last week harder that you could change in future?
  • Is there anything that helped last week and might help again in the future?
• Maybe try and complete some tasks that you know are difficult on harder days
  • This could be writing an essay, going to see a friend, calling family etc
• But really, enjoy it

And always

• Be grateful for what you have (gratitude diaries are great, even just one word per day)
• Always allow yourself to be hopeful for the future
• Forgive yourself for what has been, and strive to be better in the future
• Be kind, to others and yourself

Stay safe and stay sane x

Helpful links:

The Happy Newspaper

The Little Book of Hygge

Mind charity

Beat (Eating Disorders)

Samaritans

Action for happiness